Who Will Marry Adetutu? – Episode 4
A 23-year old’s guide to love, longing, and life.
Journal Entry 4
4/1/2025
I just told a guy I am not ready for a relationship. To be honest, I do not know if that was a lie or a truth. I am not ready for a relationship with him. Actually, I do not want a relationship with him. Somehow, I think I am mean for that. He is a good guy. Very thoughtful and sweet. A week after the week I met him, he sent me a cute little package. With a note, some gel pens, candies and cakes. This is because I told him I was trying to build a habit of bible study. How thoughtful is that? So sweet.
I do think he was a bit too forward after sending me this though. He started calling daily, which I found quite annoying. Maybe it was annoying because I didn’t like him? I think that was the reason.
But isn’t that a bit much? Calling someone who you are trying to ‘toast’ twice a day? It’s a bit much. For me at least. Then, we went on our first date, and I think it was on that day, I sealed his fate.
We went for brunch at an upscale restaurant in Lekki. ‘Le Ruinart’ (pseudonym, in case someone gets a hold of you) for some wine and biscuits. He came with more candies. Again, I thought this was sweet. Pun intended.
His car though. It did not smell good. It smelt normal. I guess I wanted to be hit by some strong car fragrance. It would have made me feel more special. Like he was making an effort. But it just smelt… normal. A little damp.
His outfit also did him no favors. He wore jeans and a hoodie. For a first date? Immediately no. He also did not smell nice. He didn’t smell of anything. I was offended by that. I used my ‘special day’ perfume for this and he came smelling like nothing. On the brighter side, his skin was glowing.
We get to the date, and we both order sugared biscuits and white wine. I really do not like alcohol, but I will drink on occasion. Like that day. The waiter comes and tells us the sugared biscuits have almost run out and one of us will have to order salted biscuits. He bites the bullet and lets me have the sugared biscuits.
The violin is playing, and a woman is singing. I really like her voice. She sounds like what I would have loved to sound like during my days as the head of choir in secondary school. The mood is romantic, and he attempts to hold my hand. I hesitate because I just met him. This is our first date. I think that’s a bit too forward. The worst was however yet to come.
Being the nice lady I am, I offered him some sugared biscuits. I handed him the plate gesturing for him to take a piece and he kept on repeating ‘give me now’. Give you how? I am literally doing that. It took him repeating ‘give me now’ 5 times for me to understand that this man was asking me to FEED HIM the biscuits. I was visibly shocked. I looked at him with some measure of disgust and said ‘you just met me, why will I be feeding you biscuits?’ It didn’t make any sense to me. I wish I was making this up.
I angrily said ‘No, I won’t be doing that. You can take some from the plate’. He never touched the biscuits. We left an hour later. On the car ride home he ‘jokingly’ called me a wicked and stingy girl. I’ll take it. I am wicked when it comes to upholding my boundaries and stingy with my affection. A very memorable first date indeed.
His name is Obed by the way. Obed that likes to be fed. A lot of things happened after that date leading to today, The day I broke his heart. I have some work to do now, so I will tell you all about it once I wrap up my work.
Oh and no music was playing today. Lately, I have been listening to a lot of worldly music, and I haven’t been consistent with the Hallelujah Challenge. I think I am backsliding haha! This happens when I start to feel overwhelmed with work or when I am ovulating which I find very odd.
I need to review my walk with God and perhaps, a retreat.
Bye for now.
With all my love,
Adetutu.
You can read episode 1 here!
